On enforcing the rules..

This is the hard part. You don't want to hurt or damage but you also can't lay down and let him walk all over you. There are people who say we are hard on Brandon but what they don't realize is that if you go outside the rules or give an inch you've lost control. We enforce the rules here at our house and everybody is involved. I hold Brandon just as responsible as his sisters. We put Brandon up with the same rules as his sisters. He also has the same consequences. We don't verbally abuse or physically abuse the kids which alot of people do. Alot of people tend to let all this get to them...the frustrations I mean. If Brandon hits someone we go over what happened and work as a family as to what the right thing to do is. We role play this with Me Robert and his sisters. This is very important. By role playing, he can work on the socially correct way to handle things. We do spank if the offense is serious enough, we also use the withdrawal of toys, computer games and XBox as an attention getter. By placing a consequence on the action we are helping him to recognize what he did. Brandon used to drive me crazy because he would hit someone and when i asked him why he would say because I did. This would go in circles. We did not have cause and effect down. If you do this, then this will happen. If you lie or hit then you get in serious trouble. Picking up a stick during recess and ignoring the teacher when she tells you to put it down and THEN getting sent to the principals office is semi serious. Running out into the street is serious . Not paying attention needs work and encouragement. We work on that ALOT. Now some might not agree, some might say that since he has autism I should not do anything but I dare say, walk a mile in my shoes. Walking that fine line between rules and hugs and discipline is a hard one for any parent. The best part is when it was over is the hugs and learning how NOT to do whatever started it in the first place. Love does answer alot of problems but Tough love answers the rest.

A day in our pajamas..

Days like today are rare. Just lying around all day in our PJ's having fun. Laughing, tickling, singing, dancing. Just the fun, smiling days that are so rare. Hugs all day. When he wants something he asks and if I say no he doesn't go into a fit. Today he even acted like his sisters. He got a little pleading face, and stuck his lip out and said PLEASE.....How can I say no to that??It's days like today that make you think that everything is normal and what life would be like without the arguing and little quirks that make Brandon so different. Then I kick myself for my pity party and just remember to be grateful for today. That's the hard part for me is the pity party's and the stress I put myself under for not seeing what was happening earlier. For not knowing. For not going to the right doctor. Here I go again... I AM grateful for today. I am blessed to have my kids and blessed to have a day in my pj's with a laughing smiling little boy. Hugs all day. As his older sister was saying today... Ready.. Set...Toothbrush...(LAUGHING KIDS ALL AROUND).

Getting through the school year

We'll I never thought this year would be easy, and I am knocking on wood... but While he's not having a perfect year, he has not hit anyone in at least 6 weeks!! Yea!! Yes, it's sad to celebrate the fact that your child hasn't hit a teacher in 6 weeks but it's the small victories that matter. I spend every night working on homework, I work during the day, we hit gymnastics, and tae Quan Do. The fun never stops. I had spent so much time not attending after school activites due to Brandon's Autism. I finally decided that it might do him some good. The hard part is telling where we are going. Several times..
Another Point... Brandon has a new assistant that is helping him. Mrs. Pope. Brandon cried and argued for the first few days because he missed Mrs. Hale. He decided he wanted to be called "B" instead of Brandon. I called his teacher to make sure she knew he was mad at Mr. Guinane(the principal) because he moved Mrs. Hale. I'm sure that would go over well for him to attack the principal out of the blue. He finally admitted he like Mrs. Pope.. I just know that it is just like Brandon to hold on to something then remember that he's mad and jump on Mr.Guinane. I'll keep you updated....