The effects it has on the siblings

What a week. My oldest girl decided that she would tell the teachers at the daycare that she would put the suntan lotion on Brandon when they were swimming. Brandon looked like a red light bulb when he came home. She really wants to help. And she tries to be responsible for him. We try to tell her to be a kid, you'll be an adult soon enough. I think that the siblings of autistic kids try to be useful and get used to acting like an adult when having to help get the autistic child from one thing to another. Even my younger child will try to help Brandon understand one thing or another. Especially when she gets tired of hearing a question over and over, she'll answer sounding exasperated. We try to explain what is going on and why he acts like he does so that they don't feel excluded or like they have to help in some way to make it better. My oldest felt sooo guilty for forgetting to put the lotion on him. I told her it really isn't her responsibility but you do need to do what you say you are going to do. We followed up with teachers and explained that she dose not need to be the one responsible, they do.

I hope I can work through this with both girls. I know that eventually I will probably get counseling for both the girls just to deal with the effects of having a sibling with autism. There are not alot of resources where we live to deal with this. HMMMM..But I think given where we live it's coming, it's just a matter of time. but how much time do I have?? or do they have??